HASRAT
by Poonum
Summary: God never gifted everything to each and Every Person. Something Missing in every person life is very common..But Sometimes God give us a way to sooth our self..Just a Need to move forward a Bit..


_SON or SUN…Both words sounds same but having really different meanings…But for a Man, both words not only sounds same but gives same kind of meanings as well Somehow…Like for a Father, Son and Sun both gives him Light.. both are source of Light in his life…Sun gives him light in his life to See everything and Son gives him Light in his Life to live everything…but Still this is not true in each and every Situation…_

_A Father and Son Bond is so special…it's sounds that Fathers loves their Daughters more and shows their love in almost each and everything..but the Silent and tough relationship between Father and Son is also very very much meaningful and Having its own space too…No one else can experience, no one can judge and no one can feel these unspoken words and feelings…Father always forgets his Daughter mistake but always tries to punish his Son…And A Son is always there with the silent question WHY ME…? Well that's the story of each house in our Asian life style…A Father always want to see his Son, A Perfect Man…well he always think to give love to his daughter bcz very soon she will left him..and no one can predict abt Next/married life of a Girl..But A boy/son don't have such benefit…And most of the time He missed this beat that His Father loves him and that's why he always shows a tough attitude towards him..bcz he want to see his Son as a Perfect person..he want to see his Son be successful..he want to see his Son as a true Man and a true learner..he want to see his Son lighten up his Name…But in A Good way not with Bad words or Deeds…and in doing that he always sounds so tough…but this is his Style to show his Love..A Pure Love…But sometimes In Doing all that, Some fathers also missed few things..which always Punished him and never give them any more Chances…Never ever.._

_He was also remembering few but meaningful moments, he spend with his Son..who was not in this World anymore but was there in his Memories and in front of his Eyes AT THE MOMENT, locked in Photo Album which was opened in his Hands right now..and One after the other he was changing photo's present in Album with a Smile present on his whole face and tears in his eyes…_

_ACP Pradyuman was enjoying Coffee in his study room…Sitting in front of open Window…It was raining outside…Fast wind and tinny drops of rain was touching his face..But not to his soul..Hot coffee was turning into cold one without any touch..Bcz ACP was totally involved in those memories which are few in his life but IS HIS LIFE…he turn another photo with his hand and spread his fingers to the photograph..A Tear slips from his eye without any hesitation…which was looking towards his Young Son Face..wearing red Tea Shirt..Smiling broadly after sitting in his father foots…A sweet but naughty voice hits his ears…_

"_**Dad, You Know what…Your Son is little more handsome than u…."**_

"_**hahahahhah….No Son..You are wrong…"**_

"_**Why….U really don't think sooo…?"**_

"_**No…(sounds naughty) really Not….infact…(pulling his cheek with a lots of love)**__**bcz for me..My Son is not little…very very handsome than me…he really looks like a Hero…"**_

"_**Well…then we both are Same…I looks like a Hero…and u are A Hero…."**_

_A pure, and full of love laughter sounds spread in the whole room….which __**WAS**__ , __**IS AND WILL ALWAYS BE **__really meaningful…_

_Before anymore tears can falls down from those eyes…he closes the Photo Album and attaches his head with head rest of his rocking chair after taking PAINFUL SIGH with closed and moist eyes…_

ACP (_sounds painful)_: Kash… kash tum asal zindagii main bhi mera HERO ban pata NAKUL….kash…Kyun nai ban paya tum wasa…kyun ?

_And now what he can't do ever…when he sat alone with his memories like this..He can't control his tears..which are always reserved for his Son..for his Son's memories…tear escaped from his closed eyes…and another memoriable sound hits his ear…_

**"_Dad, u know what..this is what I can't tolerate abt u….Ur these Tears…Mom nai tu kye hua…(removing tears) main tu hoon naa App ka pas… ager kabi naa hua tu Ansoo bahata rahiya gaa…but not now…plz Dad..(cutely) oh my lovely Dad and where is his lovely Smile….? Ummm?"_**

_His last sentence always make him smile sweetly…but today more and more tears rolls down from his same cheeks…bcz today no one is there to say this…to remove those tears like before…_

ACP (_helpless tone): _Par Ajj tum nai ho NAKUL…nai ho tum…kyun…kyun nai ho tum? Main kitna Akala hoon..kitna akala kar diya hai tum na muja…tum tu janta tha naa ka tumara Dad tumara bina bilkul Akala ho jayen gaa..Bilkul Akala..pher kyun…kyun nai tum wasa ban paya jasa main chata tha? Kyun wasa ban gaya ka mujsa dor ho gaya Beta…? Kyun…?

"_**I hate u…Suna App naa…I just Hate u…u don't deserve to be my Dad..I just Hate u…Nafrat karta hoon main app saa… Suna ACP Pradyuman..Nafrat…and U really deserve it…"**_

_And this is what..Always Sooth him..whenever he is in such type of situation…These sentences always help him to forget that pain…which is enough to break him…these sentences always remind him that he is ACP Pradyuman..and what he did was not Wrong but was his Duty…what all happened was not totally wrong..But What abt a FATHER? What abt that Empty space in his heart? What abt those feelings which are enough to realize him that he missed his Duty as a Father…As a Good father…? A Door bell helps him to came out from all those feelings, memories and deep thoughts…he clears his wet face and Stood up after jerking his head..after placing Photo Album on his rocking chair…he moves to open the door… _

_And When he opens the Door…he saw HIM…HIS hesitant but Smiley Face…**and Life Gives him his Answer**…If he Missed to give his Love to his Deserving Son…if his those fatherly feelings are yet not satisfied yet…then there is someone else too in his life..who also missed something same..who missed those feelings, that love from his Parents Side…if he can survive then why not HE….? WHY NOT…? Yes he got his answer after seeing the face..who was looking at him and was waiting for any response from his side…_

Person (_confused)_: Sir…Main Ander aye jayon…? (_call him again) _Sirrrr?

ACP (_unexpectedly n wd a feel): _Aye jayo BETA….

_That "BETA" always forget to touch his Ears walls..but always touches his heart and bring tears in his eyes…he looks towards his SIR…and ACP smiles a bit and jerks his head with…_

ACP: Kye hua Daya…? Aye jayo Beta…

_Daya came in with same deep feelings and with different aroma present around him…ACP moves and Daya closes the main door and starts following ACP silently….After entering inside the Study room..Daya looks around and prise ACP as.._

Daya: Sir app na Study ko kafi acha sa SET kar rakha hai…

ACP (_smiles, still showing his back): _Daya meri Study wasa ki wasi hai…kafi bar dhak chukka ho tum issa…(_looks at him) _itna Hesitate kyun ho…gabroyo mat aur aram sa Betho wahen…

_Daya smiles forcefully and sat on chair, offered by ACP…Basically he was hesitating bcz In morning ACP ask him to join him at home after Duty hours…bcz Abhijeet was missing for almost a Month for a mission..and Daya was missing him badly…he was really missing someone to talk…to share and feeling really Alone..And ACP was noticing all this from so many days..so he offered him to come at his Home tonight and spend sometime with him…Daya tries to deny but ACP left the topic after saying "I will wait for u…"…Now how can Daya deny this…? He must be there…but now What he do? What to talk and how to talk? He was really hesitating and feeling awkward.._

ACP (_formally): _Coffee or Tea…?

Daya (_nodded as No): _No Sir…Thank You…

_ACP who was standing in front of Book Shelf and checking some of his books asked as…_

ACP: Daya tum chayo tu mera pas sa kuch books laa jayo…Abhijeet ko gaya hua itna din ho gaya aur tum bore bhi ho raha hoga…maine tumara liya kuch books select bhi ki thien..par abi smaj nai aye raha ka wohi doon yah kye karon…Tuma pasand tu haina books parna…

Daya: Jee…jee sir..

_ACP looks at him…_

Daya (_low tone): _Actually….No..no sir…

ACP (_smiles): _Actually main bhi yahi soch raha tha ka tuma tu books parna ka koi khas shok nai aur wo bhi asi jasi mera pas hain… Khere koi zaberdasti nai…main tu bas asa he Time pas ka liya suggest kar raha tha…

Daya: Thank…Thank You Sir…

_Again Silence was present in the room…ACP was looking outside the window..and Daya was sitting silently and feeling really odd in such type of situation…when photo Album present in rocking chair caught his attention..he moves and takes the album in his hands and opens it…and then he looks towards ACP shockingly, who was standing there, looking outside after showing his back towards Daya…he shuffles two to three photos and then was abt to close the Album in hurry when he hears as…_

ACP (_smiley tone): _Kitna Young Dikh raha hoon naa main inn Picture mein….(_Daya looks at him in shock, while ACP added in laugh) _Haan bae tumara jasa YOUNG nai par ab sa tu young he…

Daya (_smiles sadly and added in low tone): _Sir …App Yah?

ACP (_moves with sad smile): _bas kabhi kabhi akala hota hoon tu issa (_pointing towards Photo Album) _khool ka beth jata hoon…(_sat down on his chair) _malom hai..mera pas Yahi thora sa Sarmya hai bas…inn chand Tasveeron ka siwa mera pas Apna kuch nai hai Daya…(_Daya was hearing him with shock state) _Aur karna bhi kye hai…(_clearing his moist eyes) _ini yadoon ka Boj uttaya nai jata tu aur…aur kye…_And he stops after feeling lump in his throat and moves his gaze away and again starts looking outside the window…Daya who was looking at him with strange and unknown feelings unwillingly says as…._

Daya: Kabhi kabhi inn yadoon ka Boj ko Jee bhi lana chiya Sir…(_ACP looks at him) _Shukarguzar hona chiya inn yadoon ka…ka kam sa kam kuch hai tu Yaad karna ko…(_ACP was feeling his feelings, his missed points of his life) _yah bhi kushnaseebi ki baat hai Sir..ka kam sa kam kuch hai tu…(_happy but moist tone) _wo kye khata haina Sir..kuch Naa hona saa tu Kuch Hona Acha hai…._And he smile sadly after looking towards ACP…who was looking at him strangly…with so many mixed feelings…then what Daya thinks or feel..he opens that half closed Album and starts looking towards those pics after giving words as.._

Daya: Malom hai Sir Mera pas tu apni zindagii ki asi aik bhi tasveer nahin…koi yaad bhi nahin…Naa in tasveeron ka jasa aur naa he Wasa…Par acha hai Sir…mujh mein tu shyad itni Himaat bhi nahin…(_his voice was really sounding how much he missed all this) _Har koi app jasa Himmat wala tu nai hota naa Sir…(_he looks at him and then again starts shuffling pics) _Yah dakiya sir..iss main App kitna Young dikh raha hain..aur iss Pic main..(_hesitate, but added) _Nakul aur app kitna acha sa muskura raha hain…

ACP (_unknowingly): _Haan…tab kye malom tha ka Wo muskurahat asa mit jaya gi…aur main Inn Ansooyon ka sath asa he rah jayon gaa yahen…

Daya (_looks at him with moist eyes): _Wo Muskurahat Kabhi Hum na jee thi…kam sa kam yah Ehsass tu hai…(_deep tone) _aur app nai janta Sir Yah EHSAAS kitna ahem hota hai..kitna KHAS…yah tu un saa pochiya jin ka pas asa koi Ehsass tak nahin…

_With this ACP instantly stood up from his chair and just Hugs his Officer so tightly who was still stilling and just loses himself in this Fathery arms…Daya just brust out into tears…who was already fed up with this Lonely time..bcz Abhijeet was missing from his life from almost 21 days…and he was feeling really alone..and No All this really makes him to expel out all this Scare, loneliness and his pain…_

Daya (_hugs him tightly from his waist): _Kyun Sir…Kyun mera pas asi koi Feelings..asi koi YAAD nai hai? Kyun ? Kyun jab kabhi main kssi ko apni Yaadon ka sath Asa Jeeta dhakta hoon tu muja Ajj bhi yah Kami mehsoos hoti hai..? kyun muja Apna App ADHORA mehsos hona lagta hai Sir….? I m sorry sir..i m sorry..app muja galat mat..muja asa nai..par kyun hota hai yah Ehsas…Kyun? _And he really burst out into tears…Where ACP Silently stored all that Pain in his arms who himself was finding the answer of this **KYUN..?**…He really makes one more Memory of his Life at the Moment…he looks upward and says Thanks to GOD for sending this pure heart at the moment…to give him this Sooth..to give this Sooth to his Already hurt feelings and love…he really want his SON to give all those Love which he missed in his life…and GOD send him for him at the moment…and on the other hand Daya feels that sooth which he was missing in his life always..But at this moment his Emotions was on its peak so he really needed this Fatherly Hug…_

**KYUN AJEEB SAA YAH SAMAN HAI…**

**KYUN AJEEB SII YAH FIZA HAI….**

**HAI KAMI KOI GHERA HUA TUJA BHI…**

**HAI KAMI KOI MUJHA BHI GHERA HUA…**

**SHYAD NASEEB NAA MILA DIYA ISSI LIYA…**

**MERA IRAD GIRD JO YAH SAMAH HAI…**

**HAI HANSTA MUSKURATA HUA SAA…**

**HAI ROOTHTA MANATA HUA SAA…**

_ACP closes his teary eyes..and each and every moment was giving him this feel that he is hugging his Son..he is there with him…and Daya was already in any other dreamy world…_

**KYUN AJEEB SAA YAH SAMAN HAI…**

**KYUN AJEEB SII YAH FIZA HAI….?**

_After how much time ACP opens his eyes…he himself don't know..he don't want to break this soothing shell…Daya realized and loses his grip after few moments…and ACP after feeling no voice from Daya's side release him from his tight hug…Daya realized and tries to remove his tears from his face instantly before ACP can see his wet face like this..But ACP stops him after touching his face from his both hands And then turns his face towards his side and clears his tears after cupping his face into his both hands…he was removing his tears one by one..which were still falling down from his eyes after this sweet touch…_

ACP (_saying while removing tears)_: Tumara Pita nahin tu kye hua…Main tu hoon naa tumara pas…Kye mujh main tuma apna Pita kabhi nai dikha Daya…? Maine tu humesha tum main apna Nakul Dhaka hai…(_Daya's eyes were only fixed on ACP's face, his ears were hearing everything but he himself was in some other world) _jab kabhi tuma yah laga.. yah aik Pita ki zarorat ho..tum mera pas nai aye sakta kye Daya…? (_teary tone) _Aye jaana Beta…Shyad tuma bhi acha laga..aur muj…muja bhi yah laga ka mera Nakul …mera Nakul aye gaya hai mera…mera pas… _And with this once again he loses his control and hugs him with the same feel that he is hugging his own Son…NAKUL…. And this time was for Daya…to relax his father..to give him those feelings which he was missing in his life badly…He hugs his father and starts patting his back with smooth hands..And After some meaningful moments Both separated… and ACP instantly removes tears from his face…when…_

Daya: Ager aik Pita apna Beta ka Ansoo ponj sakta hai tu… (_stood up and removing ACP tears with) _aik Beta sa aik pita ko bhi sharmana ki koi zarorat nahin hai Sir…

_ACP patted on his cheek with teary eyes but with smile, present on his face…_

ACP (_loving tone): _Bagwaan tumara jasa Beta sab ko daa…kitna kushnaseeb tha wo Maa baap jina bagwaan na tum jasa beta diya..

Daya (_tears appears on Daya's eyes): _Mera samna he khara hain wo kushnaseeb….

_ACP nodded his head with smile..while his tongue was failed to search some words to speak those feelings.. with same smiley face ACP moves with.._

ACP: Main tumara liya Coffee bana ka lata hoon..Ramu ajj chuti par hai tu… _And ACP was abt to leave, when Daya holds his hand from his wrist and ask him as…_

Daya: Ager ajj aik Beta apna Pita ka liya Coffee banya tu…?

_ACP looks at him for the moment and then nodded with teary eyes and smiley face as…_

ACP (_Smiles Broadly): _SURE….

_Daya smiles and moves towards kitchen…where he was trying to search so many things for making coffee…when his father came to help him…he stands there after attaching with counter and starts looking towards his Son..who was making coffee…A sweet and very unknown feelings were present around ACP...After making coffee Daya served it to ACP…who taste it and really prise it as.._

ACP: Lovely coffee…

Daya (_feels really happy): _Thank you sir…

ACP (_looking towards Shy Daya): _Wasa …Abhijeet bhi kafi lucky hai..jis ka pas tum ho…

Daya (_looks at him for the moment and then naughtily): _wo tu hai Sir…

_And both shared a good laugh and then moves towards TV lounge…_

ACP: Daya mera sath koi mera zamana ki Movie dhako gaa…?

_Daya looks at him and nodded happily with…_

Daya: Sure Sir…why Not….

_And both sat down on Carpet and starts enjoying one very old movie...while watching movie…ACP was telling so manythings to Daya abt the movie, cast...his experience attaches with the movie..that how manytimes he watches this movie and How?…Daya was enjoying all this….That awkwardness, hesitation where vanished he himself don't realize..he was enjoying this pure and full of love aroma…Even ACP forgets all this…and when he looks towards Daya while saying…_

ACP (_laughing sound): _Aur janta ho Daya…jab Salunkha ka sath yah movie dhaki tu kitna bore hua main..aur wo… _And he looks towards Daya and stops instantly…A very sweet smile crept on his face…Daya slept there after attaching his head with ACP's shoulder….ACP was first looking towards that innocent face..where so much sooth was present now..he takes out his arm slowly and then cover Daya from his shoulder to support his head completely…stretches his legs after closing TV with remote and attaches his head with cushion and back with sofa after closing his eyes..with a great sooth present in his heart, mind and in his whole body…UNDISCRIBEABLE….where Daya was sleeping on his shoulder peacefully…_

_Sometimes, Moving Little Ahead..Leaving all boundaries and hesitation…Crossing limits will gives you such a Precious Bond and feelings..which may not be survive like same way always..But will be there with you always..will Touch ur heart always and will give u a Big lesson, strength and will come with great sooth and feelings always…_

_**AUTHOR's NOTE:**_

_Thanks for Reading..Don't forget to Review..Plz…Urs Poonum_


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